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Eye of the Storm

We all know what the eye of a storm is. It is the peaceful area around which a whirlwind is blowing in full swing. It is a safe rounded pocket around which the storm is howling with full force. The tornado is sweeping around in full force but the ‘eye’ is quiet and peaceful.
How nice it would be if we too could be calm and serene in the midst of chaos – in the eye of the storm!
Surprisingly enough, it’s much easier than you might imagine it to be in the eye of a “human storm”. I learned the trick after experimenting with it a number of times. All my life, I had the habit of jumping into the very center of the storm of a discussion, debate, heated argument. I would become a ‘party, a ‘partisan’, a committed person to one side and thus open to onslaughts by the other side. Now, pretty late in life, I have learned the ‘trick’ of remaining in the eye of the human storm till I find the most appropriate moment to step calmly into the debate.
Suppose you are going to a family gathering that is likely to be chaotic. You can tell yourself that you are going to use the experience as an opportunity to remain calm. You can commit to being the one person in the room who will be an example of peace to others. You can practice breathing while others are shouting. You can practice listening. You can let others be right and enjoy the glory of that moment. You can do it if you set your mind to it.
In the house of your Mom’s eldest sister in Jabalpur (10 members of the family when I visited it in 1975), everyone spoke loudly, nay, almost at the top of their voices. I asked my “my b-in-law”, the head of the family, how one could make others hear him in this din. He smiled and said, “I use a trick. When everybody is shouting, I keep quiet. Then choosing a moment I say something in undertones, almost a whisper. My whisper is out of tune in the top range of their mutual bickering, and, therefore, they all hear it. Then they become relatively quiet, and it is then and then only that I give my opinion.”
By starting out with harmless scenarios like a family gathering, cocktail parties, and birthday parties for children, you can build a track record and enjoy some success. You’ll notice that by being in the eye of the storm, you will be more present-moment oriented. Once you have practiced (and mastered it) in the microcosm of your own family, you can practice on more difficult areas of life – dealing with conflict, hardship, or grief. If you start slowly, have some success, and keep practicing, pretty soon you’ll know how to live in the eye of the storm.
My precious children! Please do not think, even for a moment, that I am preaching what I don’t practice myself. I have been wrong all of my life in shouting, letting others know, and acknowledge my presence, and it was only in the last two years that I have learned this technique. I am writing these missives to you only because I want you not to learn these hard truths of life the hard way I have.

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Feminism: A movement to end sexism I don’t know why a lot of people are afraid of women’s and girls’ rights. So many people send me messages on messenger not to speak for (بے حیائی). Demanding equal rights for the oppressed women is not (بے حیائی). This is the fight against harassment. And dear men, harassment isn’t confined to work place only. Women & girls are even harassed in the so-called educational institutions by the educated misogynists. Can you identify an organisation, university, or any other social platform that ensures or provides safe environment to girls & women? The answer is surely No. The problem with a lot of people who call themselves so-called feminists is that they misunderstand the meaning of feminism. Feminism is the belief in social, economic and political equality of the sexes. In other words, feminism is a movement to end sexism. There are a lot of reasons of harassment that women go through. Among them, the primary one is the patriarchal society. A society where men are dominant. Patriarchy cannot be eradicated completely. However, we can struggle to fight for the rights of women by educating our youth. People ask for girls education. Girls are already pursuing education in different institutions. The problem is that they are repeatedly harassed by the nasty patriarchal mindsets that exist here. Unless we endeavour to end the system that prejudices people based on their sexes, we cannot think of a safe environment for our mothers & sisters at any type of work place. Remember, book reading plays a pivotal role in this regard. Majority of our youth are not truly sincere with themselves. Being a student of honors at Balochistan University Of Information Technology Engineering And Management Sciences (BUITEMS), I see a lot of youth in university sitting in different canteens, waisting their time being indulged in useless conversations with each other. Most of the students are concerned about marks. Getting a desired CGPA satisfy them. Majority of the students say that they just attend classes for the sake of passing time. However, there are very few ones who come to university with full enthusiasm and are truly sincere with their studies. They are the real ones who realise the importance of girls & women in this world. Apart from teaching text books, our teachers should also promote the importance of reading researched books. Teachers can play a significant role in promoting book reading culture. They can help our youth how to think critically, and how to take critical approache while reading something. Let’s not squander our time. Let’s struggle to ensure a better and safe environment to our sisters. Let’s struggle to fight for the rights of oppressed ones. Unless we the youth come out of our comfort zones and take the primary responsibility of educating each other through promoting the book reading culture, we cannot think of a better and prosperous society.

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